10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?