10 Random Poker Quotes

• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm