10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.