10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"