10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.