10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.