10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.