10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.