10 Random Poker Quotes

• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio