10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Fold and live to fold again
• You have to piss with the dick you have