10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• It's Free To Fold...