10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.