10 Random Poker Quotes

• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT