10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.