10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier