10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson