10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth