10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.