10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die