10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'